


believing is easier than seeing

by aizensosuke



Series: Kinktober 2018 [13]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Anal Sex, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, Gags, M/M, Post-Betrayal, Power Bottom Gin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-15
Updated: 2018-10-15
Packaged: 2019-08-02 16:06:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16308371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aizensosuke/pseuds/aizensosuke
Summary: gin visits kira after betraying all of soul society at aizen's side.





	believing is easier than seeing

When Ichimaru Gin appears in his doorway in the dead of the night, the last thing Kira Izuku should do is let him into his quarters. He should have been able to move on from Gin’s betrayal so he could prepare himself for the oncoming battle when Aizen’s plan eventually began to make itself known and Soul Society had to fight him and whatever army he was no doubt amassing out in Hueco Mundo. After all, the rest of Soul Society suspected Gin of evil doings even when Kira held out the vain hope that Gin had nothing to do with the darkness growing in the shadows, the battles forced between the shinigami.

In the end, Kira had been right. Gin had not killed Aizen, had not staged a letter in Aizen’s handwriting to confuse Hinamori, and had not murdered the members of Channel 76. Gin was—  _ is _ — an accomplice instead, and Kira was brought to his knees by his captain’s betrayal.

He should raise an alarm. Try to subdue Gin himself while aid arrives and hope they can somehow take him down even though he knows firsthand just how powerful Gin is and how underestimated he is by the other captains. He should not, in contrast, fist his hands in the soft fabric of Gin’s haori and draw him inside and away from prying eyes, clinging to him even now.

Kira is soft. Kira is foolish. And Kira understands Hinamori’s desperate love for Aizen even though he does not want to admit that to anyone.

“Izuru,” Gin greets him, the familiarity of his voice sending a shiver of relief down Kira’s spine. “It appears as though you did miss me in my absence. I was curious.”

Oh, Kira  _ longed _ for Gin’s return to Soul Society, held out hope that everything was a lie and Gin was only using Aizen for some purpose none of the rest of them understood. Admitting to himself that Gin was the villain everyone made him out to be almost broke Kira’s spirit.

He has a thousand questions;  _ why _ is the loudest and most important of them all, but all of those words melt like spun sugar on his tongue as he releases Gin’s haori in favor of touching his face, fingers so careful on his skin like he might disappear the moment Kira truly makes contact with him. The skin beneath his fingers is familiar, soft and smooth and warm and a broken noise leaves his throat. More than anything, he wants to pull his captain into his arms and never release him, but he knows better than anyone how impossible that is.

“Of course I missed you.” The strain in his voice is clear and he sees the corner of Gin’s mouth twitch at the sound. Does it bring him pleasure, Kira’s pain? It would not be surprising. Not now. “You left me here and you left with them. I don’t understand. Why did you ever choose me?”

Gin sighs softly, curling his fingers around Kira’s wrist, holding his hand carefully in place as he tilts his head, lips brushing over the cup of Kira’s palm. “Do not make this personal.”

“Was… Were we passing the time until you and Aizen left?” Kira does not want an answer and has no idea why he even bothers asking in the first place.

“Of course not. You think so poorly of me now, I’m wounded. You shielded me from Hinamori’s blade and took upon grave punishment for protecting me, and now you think of me as some common villain.” Gin sighs against his skin and Kira shivers, goosebumps rising on his skin. “I’m so disappointed, but I suppose I should have spoken to you before I left.”

Kira’s teeth drag over his lower lip slowly, teeth pressing down hard into his skin as he stares at Gin’s face and wills himself to understand such vague words. “Ichimaru-taicho—”

“No, darling. Not anymore. I’m not your captain.” Gin presses his cheek into the half-curl of Kira’s hand and smiles softly at him. “Just Gin. You missed me so much I’m surprised you even managed to survive in such a state. I really should have come to see you.”

Part of Kira wants to agree that  _ yes, _ Gin should have come to see him sooner than this, should not have led him on in such a way. But Gin is here now and he can’t find it in himself to be as harsh and cruel as he deserves to be for this. Instead, he slides his hand around to the back of Gin’s neck and brings him a step closer, desperate to kiss him, to taste his lips even if this is the last time. If he has this, he might be able to get Gin go like he should.

Gin pauses just before he can and Kira tries not to whine. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes.”  _ Of course. _ “Gin, please—”

“Hush, Izuru. You’re so loud.” Gin lays a finger over his lips and Kira swallows hard at the gentle pressure there. “I have limited time, but I suppose I can give you this one thing.”

He steps into Kira’s personal space and kisses him, their lips meeting softly in the middle like they have a thousand times before. Kira’s uncertainty bleeds into passion and desperation, need coursing through his body like a living thing as he pulls Gin into his arms, his hold on him tight like he can keep Gin here if he just embraces him firmly enough. In contrast, Gin’s hands are light as they settle on his shoulders, letting Kira lead the kiss, letting Kira lick his way into Gin’s mouth without so much as a flicker of resistance.

This would be enough, he rationalizes. Enough to let Gin go once and for all. When Kira steps away from him, resolved to get on with his life, Gin raises his eyebrows at him. “That’s all? My, and I thought you missed me. Maybe I was wrong about that, after all.”

“What?” Kira’s throat is tight, his breath stuttering. “What do you—”

Gin sighs softly and shrugs out of his haori, draping it over the back of a nearby chair. “Show me how much you’ll miss me when I have to leave. I’ve missed you too, you know. No one ever looked at me the same way you do. The way you are right now, even.”

“We can’t do this.” He wants to, though. He wants to touch Gin, kiss him again.

“Perhaps we should not, but nothing is stopping us.” Gin hesitates, fingers brushing over Kira’s lips once more. “But we should do something about your voice, Izuru. You’re very vocal when the two of us are together, and in this instance, being caught is not ideal.”

Kira wants to argue with him. Letting his former captain into his quarters only to have Gin tell him he needs to be gagged is not ideal, but Kira swallows back his objections and nods once. “Fine. Gag me with whatever you choose if it means I can have you once more.”

The white silk cloth is simple and Gin ties it around the back of his head to keep it in place, careful not to knot it into his hair before he presses Kira back on his bed, straddling his hips and placing a hand on his chest. The subtle command is there in the lines of his body, the set of his jaw and Kira is not one to argue. Damp silk weighs heavy on his tongue as he opens Gin’s kosode, desperate to touch Gin’s bare skin again.

“Enchanting how desperate you truly are for me.” Gin strips slowly, Kira’s hurried fingers doing little to assist in the ways he wants, but it’s hard when Gin wants him to stay where he is. “Now, now, you’ll receive what you so desperately crave. I didn’t come here to leave you wanting.”

The thought is laughable. Of  _ course _ Kira will be left wanting when Gin must leave, but for now he lets such a concern go, teeth digging into the gag as his fingers press into Gin’s hips.

Gin’s lips trail soft kisses across his jaw and down his throat and Kira’s eyelids flutter at the sensation, hands twitching as he slides them slowly but Gin’s bare back, over scars sustained from battle and smooth skin. His fingers trace the line of Gin’s spine and he hears Gin’s soft sigh of pleasure, his body shifting back so that Kira can feel the press of Gin’s ass against his crotch. Even with minimal touches, his cock is already half-hard beneath the robe he’d worn to bed.

“So responsive for me when I’ve done so little.” Gin shifts back further, his fingers parting Kira’s robe, curling around the length of his cock and stroking it to full hardness. “Will you prepare me, Izuru? Or do you want to sit back and watch— Ah, of course you don’t.”

Gin doesn’t get to finish his question before Kira reaches for him, pulling Gin back up his body so he can reach him, fingers digging into the unfairly soft roundness of his ass. Without needing to ask, Gin leans up to find the lubricant Kira kept specifically for his visits, letting Kira snatch it from between his fingers without a word. He sighs softly when Kira’s fingers slip inside of him, the coolness of the liquid not seeming to bother him as he rolls his hips to take Kira’s fingers deeper inside of him. He’s hot inside, tight around Kira’s fingers.

The realization has Kira making strangled and desperate noises against the gag, whining softly when Gin whimpers for him, Kira’s fingers curling to massage his prostate. He’s  _ perfect, _ his hips meeting Kira’s fingers, his sounds soft and breathless, too quiet to be heard outside.

“Inside now, Izuru.” Gin touches his chest, fingers tracing a delicate design over his skin that has him trembling and whining. “I want you inside of me. I’ve missed your touch desperately.”

_ Then stay. _ Kira knows he can’t, though.

Gin takes the lubricant from him, slicking Kira’s cock with knowing fingers, giving him a few swift pumps that have his eyes rolling back in his head. When Gin shifts up, Kira’s hands are on his hips to stabilize him, helping Gin guide himself down on the head of Kira’s cock. There’s no hesitance and barely any resistance from the stretched muscle of his rim but Kira keens just the same, biting into sink as Gin sinks down on him in one slow, fluid motion.

“Oh, that’s lovely.” Gin’s eyelashes flutter and Kira sees the slightest flicker of beautiful river blue before Gin’s hands come to rest on his chest, pressing down firmly. “Don’t stop touching me.”

Kira’s hands are everywhere. Clumsy despite their numerous nights together, too excited and jittery to remain in one spot for too long. Gin rides him with a surety that Kira envies, an even rhythm that has Kira’s body jerking in answer, hips twitching up when Gin comes down on him, sinking his cock as deep as he can. Gin croons softly with the motion, nails digging into Kira’s skin, and Kira can see Gin’s eyes, beautiful blue, peering down at him, dancing with amusement and something that feels fond and affectionate and makes Kira’s chest hurt.

“You feel so good inside of me.” Gin chuckles down at him, catches Kira by the wrist and draws his hand to his own leaking cock, flushed and hot between his thighs. “Touch me here now.”

_ Yes. Of course. Always. _ Kira chews on the silk as he wraps his hand around Gin’s cock, pre-come dribbling over his fingers and creating obscene wet sounds with every stroke. It’s worth it to see Gin arch for him, to feel his internal muscles tighten around Kira’s cock.

It takes so little for Kira to come, Gin grinding down against him to draw the pleasure out until his eyes threaten to roll back in his head. Still, his hand works Gin’s cock fervently; his other joins it, both of them working in tandem until Gin moans pitifully for him, spilling white hot all over his hands. In the silence that follows, Gin leans down to kiss him, fingers slipping behind Kira’s head to untie the knot holding the gag in place.

“So perfect as always, Izuru.” Gin kisses him before he can speak, tongue curling through his mouth left dreadfully dry from how much spit had soaked into the fabric. Kira kisses him back, tasting something bitter like regret on Gin’s tongue. “I have to go now. Perhaps we will see each other again soon, but don’t hold out on my return. And trust me, Izuru. Never stop.”

He takes his leave as quickly as he came and Kira sits up on his bed, drawing a knee against his chest and resting his cheek against it.  _ Trust me, Izuru. Never stop. _ He barks soft, bitter laughter at the thought, wishing he’d been able to tell Gin he’d never stop believing in him.


End file.
